I have always been something of a "hopeless romantic."

[StayPuft]

(Note: So... I must admit that I am just babbling a little here. LOL! No hard feelings to anybody who doesn't feel like reading the novel I am about to write. ;-) But, it is just something that feels good to get out, so I figured what the heck?)

So, with everything that has gone on in my life lately, like anybody else probably would, I went through the sort of emotions you would expect. I went through all the "I don't think I can ever do this to myself again. I am just happier alone" type stuff.

But, I found that before long, I bounced back. Though, I knew I had never really been appreciated, or treated well in my relationship, it took that time to myself to realize that not only is that not normal, but it is not okay. It took me some time to myself, but I started to realize that I would be cheating myself if I came to that conclusion.

The truth of the matter is I have always been the "hopeless romantic" type. I have talked about the sitcom How I Met Your Mother here before, and the funny thing is, I really relate to Ted Mosby. If you have seen that show, that is really the best way I can think to sum it up. I never had much of a self-esteem (if any), but I have developed one in my recent history, and going through what I have gone through recently, instead of hindering that, has only made it stronger. So, I may still not that I am all that great, but I do think I deserve a chance to find somebody who will. And I haven't given up on finding her.

The one thing that I have found through all of this that has made me very happy is that I have discovered happiness within myself. I no longer feel like I NEED to find my soulmate. But that doesn't mean I don't still want to find her. And that is kind of a relieving feeling for me. Because it means that an important part of who I am has not died after all. But, it also means that I can be happy with me, and find happiness within myself even if she may never come along. But, I hope that some day she does, and I work every day to make myself more and more the kind of man who would actually deserve the kind of woman I have always been dreaming I'd find.

Anyway, sorry to be corny. LOL! Let's go back to talking about flesh eating zombies, blood sucking vampires, and haunted scarecrows now. LOL!