Hell Campaign Battle Journal

[Old Dwarf]

Journal of Hans Rupbert Gluck,Commander Hell
Expeditionary Force.



Madgeberg,25 November,1632


A grey dawn got up on the martyred city of Magdeburg. Those of her inhabitants who had survived roamed aimlessly, like ghosts, faces dirty with soot and grime. The dogs were competing for the remains of the dead with the soldiery. Around us everything was just ruin and misery. I progressed with my Officers in the middle of calcined buildings, on a pavement soiled by blood and by corpses. The breeze of the morning was whirling the soot burned remains of the Hanseatic city, blocking our vision, dirtying our lungs. In an alley below, a girl succumbed to shrieks in the carnal appetite of her executioners. Her parents were content to watch, glassy eyed, throats cut. I diverted my gaze in front of this repeated merry-go-round

A sort of tiredness invaded me, a felling of déjà vu. At night the ghosts of my victims were tormenting me. The cacophony of their cries resounding in my head, shouting, swearing, cursing me! May they burn in hell! I did my job as a soldier, nothing more.

My iron chapel adjusted and my armour plating tightened, I ignited a good big cigar shielded from the wind. Savoring the bitter stenches of the tobacco mixed with the powder, I took position on the pinnacle of a destroyed temple. My gaze drifted into the distance, I saw the slopes of the Elba bathed in the light of the fading day and the small fires of the garrisons still on guard in the trench circle. Closer to me, the city steps, the Elba covered with a shroud of mist, sparkled with a thousand fires. The moon would die little by little in a dirty sky punctured with a red sun. God, by your mercy, allow me to again contemplate your sun. There where I go, Lord, I shall keep only a weak memory.

A door had opened on hell. The idea of throwing myself into the lair of the devil terrified me completely. According to some, this demonic portal was the result of our barbarity and our growing depravity. I did not know what to think, in truth I wanted to drink until the situation changed, however I was expected at dawn, not far from the door. I was finally going to see the beasts of my nightmares.

The Emperor in obedience to his Holy Father had taken up the Crusade against Hell.He instructed the Compte de Tilly, our general to create an Expeditary Force & I by what ill luck I was chosen to lead this conquest .

The troops waited for us two streets back from the door, a little annoyed. The rain had replaced the sun and large drops were falling on the exposed guards. God pissed on us from above, he must have his reasons. I have to admit that before dancing with Lucifer, a small keeping back of his divine bladder would not have been too much.

Finally………..



The company had been ordered into single file for parade for the Priest to bless us.I then had a chance to observe the Thuggish Milita soldiers with weasel faces that made up a full 3rd of my Force. They were equipped with whatever cast off weapons they could find even farm implements. Their tendency to turn coat in a very shitty situation indicated them at first sight as troops which we could sacrifice.

My verterans, hardened by a decade of war, would act as shock troops. Tilly had come to attend our departure. The man I knew had changed. His speech was great and noble, his features emaciated, his skin waxy.

In passing the cordon guards supposed to control access to the door, Tilly left me “I’m sorry Hans”Which made me cold down my back. Already a smell of decomposition reached my nostrils, a deaf humming was heard: in voices, pleasant, intoxicating, a noise of water falling. The temperature began to rise little by little, and in less than ten fathoms I saw it, I was there!

Terrifying, fascinating, gigantic, devilish, were my first thoughts!

Long Bridge in the bastion of Holzmarch, a Vortex crackling of purpurins flashes of lighting swirled on the Elba. A scarlet luminescence pulsated on it’s surface bubbled like a gigantic pot….. Hundreds of corpses floated within the maelstrom of great art, deserving of the human race.

On banks dirtied with mud and with ash, a gigantic arched hoist had been built by the sappers. Worthy of the most beautiful Gothic cathedrals, built with the bronze and the blackened iron of the devastated city, this crane had to make a way to cross the door in a cogue loaded with good and faithful Christians. The destination: Hell!

We the first boarded our ship. The men were shaking, vomiting, some shit themselves above. After a fiery sermon from the priest, we began our desent.

Our lives would never be the same again. It was not brilliant before, however I’ll let you imagine the afterwards. The smell of burned flesh and death below filled our nostrils. The boat pitched, the chain of descent clicked, we went down, we sank, body and soul.

When the cogue touched the surface a great light struck me, and I saw all the major events of my life again, in an accelerated state. The men roared, convulsed, drooled or spat blood. A strident noise resounded in my head. I lost consciousness, the world closed in around me.



How, how did we get here. After fighting in all four corners of Europe, I thought I had seen everything. The rules were simple then, just a dirty enterprise between people of ill will. We raped here, we violated there, we always plundered, by vice or out of necessity. Sometimes, for amusement, we would slice a guy or two, the teasing side of a soldier I presume.

The rules of the game differ greatly in the worlds of hell. Having nerves of steel before entering was certainly required.

We should never have come here. This world is not ours and now it is too late to turn back. A place in the ballet of death, blood and tears.


Hell Level I,12th December 1632

We have prepared a fortfied Camp which will gradually be expanded into a Fort.I have sent out scouts to get some bearings but have seen no Demons or any of the Damned who are suppose to be here yet.

My Expeditionary Force seems to be a polyglot of what General Tully could spare.An Austrain Brigade of Halberds under Col.Ritter & three Bavarian Argebust Battalions under Majors Reinbeck,Hoffman,Weinbach plus an Imperial Battalion of Major SchwarzKopf Doppelsöldners.I have but a single Battery of Artillery under Captain Volker.

I also have been give 3 Battalions of Bohemian Militia,poorly armed with little discipline & really nothing but an armed mob.They will probably be more trouble than their worth.

The Holy Sea has sent Papal Troops ,a Halberd Brigade under Inquisitor-General Vincenzo Maculano de Fiorenzuola.They are good troops but I will have to struggle to impose my command over them & the Inquisitor-General is a stiff necked fanatic.

May our Gracious Savior look with favor on my Mission



Hell Level I,25th December ,1632

We celebrated the birth of out Lord with a unique gift.Our scouts returned with strange beings.One calls himself a Squmata Nomad & the other a Retiarii ( a short reptilian creature) they are residents of Hell but not Demons.

They claim to be called The Lost & were former slaves of the demons but have been able to break away & are now independent.They have provided valuable information on Hell & the Demonic hirachy of the 9 Hells.

Oncemore they offer their services to provide troops to help us crush their former Demonic Masters.I have reported this offer to General Tilly .I am now somewhat optimistic about this venture for the first time.The problems of this vile place manifest themselves daily,the constant struggle to supply my troops the problem of cannon without horses to move them.I am almost considering doing without artillery due to these problems & the unstable effects of powder in the climates of Hell.

Hell Level I,28th December,1632
The information from these Lost & of our scouts indicates that Hell is a varied environment. Although the natural effects of its climates are somewhat tempered this close to our Portal,it appears Hell goes to extremes.

We have wet Hells,Frozen Hells,Burning Hells & worst a dead zone where the souls of the damned constantly scream & lament their fate.Great Necropolsis of dead cities, make whole region a great charnal field.May God protect & deliver us.

Hell Level I ,21st February,1633

Alas what a burden has been added to me,Tilly has sent word back that the Emperor has issued a decree that No Army of the Empire may treat with these unclean Lost.They are Hell tainted & and that I must fore go any aide from them. We are to have no intercourse with Hell beings.

I sure this is the influence of Inquisitor-General Vincenzo Maculano de Fiorenzuola,a Black Crow bastard who leads the Papal State Regiments I have been blessed with,a wild eyed fanatic. I must constantly remind him he is under my orders but my militia fawns over him as if he were the Holy Father.

Hell Level I,22nd February ,1633

The Horror,the Emperors decree was published & the Militia ignorant, brutal fools seized the Lost embessaries & burned them in a mass bond fire amid much drinking & revelry.I have instructed my officers to confiscate all spirits from the men & hanged the leaders of the mob. Alas I fear we have not only rejected aide but made new enemies.

Hell Level I,15th March ,1633

I ordered the Army to advance as our Fortress stronghold has secured our base.We are moving to conquer this First Level vestruble of Hell ,as it were,I learned from the Lost that this level is dominated by the Damned unconverted led by Gilles de Rais,the degenerate French Leader from the 100 years wars.

Apparently this Level is under control of a Greater Demon of combat,who delights inkeeping these damned in constant warfare against each other.

Hell,Level I,28th March ,1633

Thus it begins.We received an envoy from Gilles de Rais,offering to parley for our passage. Alas the Priest stationed with the Unit he approached ordered the envoy burnt at the stake in line with the Emperor's decree.

We have now made another enemy & will need to fight to control this Level & gain the Portal to the next. May our Gracious Savior aide & keep us for we battle Hell.


Hell,Level I,15th April ,1633

Our Army has yet to meet the enemy & this marching through the bleakness of Hell is unnerving for the men.Hell seems to change landscapes as often as the Emperor changes hose.We have marched through wet dripping forests, burning deserts ,frozen waste & barren vistas where the screaming of the damned never cease.The worst has been the great silent, crumbling ruins,vast Necropolis which we have avoided.

No matter the landscape we march through the gray sterile soil of Hell. Lifeless,colorless it makes every footstep a reminder of how far we are from the Sun & Gods Grace.

I pray that Gilles de Rais will give battle soon as this marching is depressing the men.