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StayPuft · (This post was last modified: 08-10-2013 09:04 PM by StayPuft.)

Not another novel from me, don't worry. LOL! Just musing about life. It really is true that life can be a lot like a roller coaster. I have been through some bad crap lately, but all of it leading into bigger better things. I got out of a bad relationship not too long ago. As can be expected, that felt bad initially, but in my case I very quickly realized how good of a thing it is. Perhaps even a little more quickly than I would have liked. Would have sort of been nice to turn myself off for a little while. Guess my heart, my mind, my soul were all just not going to let me do that. Hence my latest ups and downs on this crazy coaster of life.

Things are progressing well (at least so far) with my divorce. Got an awesome new job. Though I remain cautiously optimistic about that. I've had a history of giving my loyalty to companies who don't deserve it.

I'm ready to move on when it comes to my love-life, but feel like I need to finish up my divorce, or at least be well on my way, before that. We have gotten things underway, but it is a process. Even if things end amicably as I feel they can, and she seems to think they can, it still is a process to get through.

In some ways, though, I wonder if I missed my chance. What if my dream gal was looking for me, but we missed each other because I was stuck in a relationship with somebody who never appreciated me (or anybody other than herself, for that matter)? Oh well. This is starting to turn into the novel I said it wouldn't be. LOL! So I will just leave it at that. At least I am doing my best to have a positive outlook on things. And I am 100% positive (haven't looked back or a millisecond) that I am so much better off even with myself than I ever was in that relationship.

P.S. Sorry as well for rambling on about my life crap lately. Just helps me to get it out. It is therapeutic. :-)

MoonSylver · 08-11-2013, 05:38 PM

I know the feeling. Spent literally the best years of my life married to someone who threw me away like garbage when she used me up & was done with me. I, too, wonder "what if". My chances aren't good at my age now, with nothing to offer someone else, so I can't help but wonder what might have been. But, done is done, so it doesn't matter.

From my experience, you'll go through phases of ready/not ready to move on. For me, I bounced back & forth from longing for/thinking about it, to no way/no thanks.

Whatever you decided on, good luck & don't rush into anything. Relax & try to enjoy what you can out of life.

Me, I finally decided that at this stage of life, with all my circumstances, it's really unlikely that I'll be meeting anyone else, so I've accepted the fact, quit worrying about it, & am just trying to find what enjoyment I can in life.

**samuraitrev** · 08-12-2013, 03:14 PM

The best of luck to both of you.

StayPuft · 08-12-2013, 11:55 PM

(08-11-2013 05:38 PM)MoonSylver Wrote: I know the feeling. Spent literally the best years of my life married to someone who threw me away like garbage when she used me up & was done with me. I, too, wonder "what if". My chances aren't good at my age now, with nothing to offer someone else, so I can't help but wonder what might have been. But, done is done, so it doesn't matter.

From my experience, you'll go through phases of ready/not ready to move on. For me, I bounced back & forth from longing for/thinking about it, to no way/no thanks.

Whatever you decided on, good luck & don't rush into anything. Relax & try to enjoy what you can out of life.

Me, I finally decided that at this stage of life, with all my circumstances, it's really unlikely that I'll be meeting anyone else, so I've accepted the fact, quit worrying about it, & am just trying to find what enjoyment I can in life.

I hear you, bro. So sorry about what happened to you. I remember you talking about your situation earlier. I definitely know how you feel. The only difference is that, in my case, I am so extremely glad to be ending this relationship. At the time, it was hard to determine why the heck I was still holding on, and now that I am out of the relationship, I honestly can see that there was basically no value in it for me. It was pretty much 100% take, take, take from her and I only got treated like crap for it in return. I mean, granted no situation is black and white. There were good times, and I was not 100% free of blame either. But, the fact is that I should have gotten out of this relationship a long time ago.

I certainly hope the best for you. If it is what you want, then I hope you find out you were wrong. I hope you find your true soulmate. If you really feel you are happier without, then I hope you the best in that endeavor. I myself do still want to find that special someone. It has always been a big part of who I am. I am a hopeless romantic, no matter how much I may want to or try to turn it off, I can't help but be who I am. But, I still can't help but think I missed her. Part of me feels like she was out there waiting for me, maybe right under my nose, but this crappy relationship I was in made me miss her. But, life's a b*tch and then you die. Seems the secret of life is just learning your way to be happy despite all the crap that gets heaped upon you.

MoonSylver · 08-13-2013, 12:50 AM

In my case, ultimately I probably am better off without her than with her, but that doesn't mean I didn't love her, wanted it to end, or didn't want to try & save the marriage, for the kids if nothing else, but it wasn't my call. And even though I'm better off without her, it still doesn't mean I'm happy about it. Intellectually you can know one thing & still feel another, emotionally.

(08-12-2013 11:55 PM)StayPuft Wrote: But, life's a b*tch and then you die. Seems the secret of life is just learning your way to be happy despite all the crap that gets heaped upon you.

True dat. For me life & happiness is exactly like this:

Quote:If it is what you want, then I hope you find out you were wrong. I hope you find your true soulmate. If you really feel you are happier without, then I hope you the best in that endeavor.

Meh. It's not really what I want, but I don't really think I have any choice in the matter. It's just what is. And honestly, even if the opportunity presents itself, I don't know how I'd ever trust anybody ever again. Tried it, it didn't work out so good, won't do it again, die alone & miserable. Just the way it is. Zombie18

And in more cheerful news:

StayPuft · 08-14-2013, 12:17 AM

I hear you. And, again, sorry to hear it. I am very happy that I can at least say that my situation is different in that respect. It isn't that I would have wanted the relationship to have to end. I mean, obviously I would have never gotten into the relationship in the first place if I knew it was going to turn so bad. But, now that it is over, I am extremely happy it is over. The fact of the matter is I deserve SO MUCH better. And coming from me, that is HUGE to say because I never really had much of a self-esteem, if any at all. And the fact of the matter is, being alone is much better than being with her.

Love the Dennis Leary clip, by the way. ;-)

Anyway, either way I hope you and I both find what we are looking for in life. I wish you the best. If you ever want to have a suck ex-off, feel free to PM me. LOL! I know how therapeutic it can sometimes be to blow off a little steam. Hence why I sometimes post here about this kind of stuff.

PJON · 08-14-2013, 07:47 PM

yeah, life is funny, gotta laugh.

So...im freaky...so i live a bizarro world life.

So.....on 8/1 i moved in with this guy 17 years younger than me. Its only temporary till the middle of next month.

We would woka woka like 3-4 times a week, since i moved in NOTHING !

WTF ???? I want my ups and downs like a roller coaster should. But Noooo I get the parked.

Ohhh on the emotional roller coaster ride part. This is really messing with my ego and confidiance. My head is like a merry go round, sooo confused.

sgiove · (This post was last modified: 08-14-2013 10:28 PM by sgiove.)

PJON, any guy that doesn't want to woka woka with you needs to get his head examined. Call the doctor and book an appointment as soon as possible.

Seriously, though, I guess the move-in affected him in some way. Hoping it doesn't have any long term effects and you'll be back on a trip to woka-ville soon!

MoonSylver · 08-14-2013, 10:34 PM

(08-14-2013 10:27 PM)sgiove Wrote: PJON, any guy that doesn't want to woka woka with you needs to get his head examined. Call the doctor and book an appointment as soon as possible.

Seriously, though, I guess the move-in affected him in some way. Hoping it doesn't have any long term effects and you'll be back on a trip to woka-ville soon!

You are 100% correct. If the guy won't give it up, then he's the one with the issue. Trust me on this. I'm so pent up the next chick that unzips my fly is gonna hafta wear one of these:

[Image: bomb-disposal-suit-bd2009.jpg]

PJON · 08-15-2013, 06:15 PM

(08-14-2013 10:34 PM)MoonSylver Wrote:
(08-14-2013 10:27 PM)sgiove Wrote: PJON, any guy that doesn't want to woka woka with you needs to get his head examined. Call the doctor and book an appointment as soon as possible.

Seriously, though, I guess the move-in affected him in some way. Hoping it doesn't have any long term effects and you'll be back on a trip to woka-ville soon!

You are 100% correct. If the guy won't give it up, then he's the one with the issue. Trust me on this. I'm so pent up the next chick that unzips my fly is gonna hafta wear one of these:

That is hil-F'n-lariuos. Im sorry your pent up, but i know what you mean.